License to Remember

Things you´ll want to remember about getting your marriage license:

*You´ll have to show proof of your age and name with your birth certificate or other ID, such as a driver´s license.
*If you´ve been previously married, you´ll need proof of divorce, death or annulment.
*Remember to bring cash or a check to pay for the license---most offices don´t take credit cards ; )
*Sometimes you can pick up the license, and sometimes it will be mailed; be sure to ask which at your office.

Name Change information

One of the often under rated headaches for new brides is the necessity of name change notification. You will need to notify financial institutions, government agencies, physicians, credit bureaus and personal contacts. To simplify the process there are one stop, change sites online to offer assistance, try http://www.namechangers.com

Welsh Spoons

Welsh men spent a great deal of time at sea. While away from home, they would carve "love spoons" from a single piece of wood, carving symbolic images and designs such as love, faith, devotion, etc.. When the man came home from sea, he would give the spoon to the woman he wanted to marry.

Receiving Line: Who Goes Where?

Traditionally the bride´s parents are first in the receiving line, followed by the bride and groom and then the groom´s parents. You can also include your honor attendants in the line if you want, but it´s not necessary, especially if you have a small wedding.

Italian Traditions

The groom carries a small piece of iron in his pocket during the ceremony to ward off the evil eye. The money dance is still very common at Italian weddings and today the money is most often placed in a satin bag carried by the bride.

Food, food, food....from the antipasto to the sugared almonds {which are said to ensure fertility and should be tied in bundles of 5´s or 7´s}, food plays a large part in traditional Italian weddings.

In the small villages of Italy, after the Wedding Mass, the newly married couple walks through the town plaza, greeting their friends, relatives, and neighbors. There the villagers set up a sawhorse, a log and a double handled rip-saw. The newlyweds must saw the log apart with the prompting and cheering of the crowd. When the job is finished and the log cut, it symbolizes that the man and woman must work together in all of life´s tasks.

In days gone by, many Italians avoided marrying during the months of May and August. May was reserved for the veneration of the Virgin Mary, and August was thought to invite bad luck and sickness.

Winter Weather Policies

Make sure to speak to all your vendors to find out their policies on winter storms. Do they have backup plans? How do they determine cancellation based on weather? Do they offer refunds? It is also actually possible to get "weather insurance" at a reasonable price, so ask your insurance professional for assistance.

Get it in Writing

Even if planning feels like an intimate experience with your wedding professionals, you should still insist on getting everything in writing. A respected professional should by no means be insulted. If something doesn´t go the way it should, I signed contract will give you some recourse.

Go Get That License!

You´ll apply for your marriage license at the county clerk´s office in the state where you want to be married. In some states you have to apply in the county or town where you´re going to be married.

Crossing Sticks

In a tradition carried down by African-American slaves, couples symbolically demonstrated their commitment to each other by crossing tall wooden sticks. The sticks represent the power and life of trees; by crossing the sticks the couple makes known their wish for a strong beginning to their married life.

Jewish Glass Breaking

This is the reading generally given at Jewish ceremonies:

"The breaking of the glass at the end of a wedding ceremony serves to remind of two very important aspects of a marriage. The bride and groom - and everyone - should consider these marriage vows as an irrevocable act- just as permanent and final as the breaking of this glass is unchangeable. But the breaking of the glass also is a warning of the frailty of a marriage. That sometimes a single thoughtless act, breech of trust, or infidelity can damage a marriage in ways that are very difficult to undo - just as it would be so difficult to undo the breaking of this glass. Knowing that this marriage is permanent, the bride and groom should strive to show each other the love and respect befitting their spouse and love of their life."

Giving of the Goose

Before the wedding takes place, the groom gives his future mother-in-law a wild goose (nowadays it´s usually a wooden goose). Because wild geese mate for life, the wooden goose is a promise that he will care for her daughter for life.

Phillipino Traditions

A white cord is loosely looped around the bride and groom´s neck in a figure 8 during a Philipino ceremony, symbolizing the fact that the couple will now share a lifelong bond. It is usually placed around the neck by a sponsor chosen by the couple. Often, another sponsor will pin a large veil to the bride´s head and place it around the grooms shoulder to symbolize unity.

The parents of the couple also participate in lighting a unity candle.

Arras is another common filipine tradition where the priest drops coins into the hands of the couple to symbolize fidelity and wealth.

Jumping the Broom

During slavery in the United States, African American couples were not allowed to marry formally. Instead, to make a public declaration of their commitment and love, a man and woman jumped over a broom into marriage, while others beat on drums. (The broom has long held significant meaning for the various Africans, symbolizing the start of homemaking for the newlywed couple.) Today many African-American couples include this symbolic custom in their wedding ceremony, working it in directly before the recession.

Sharing the Sake

In Japanese weddings, there is a custom of sharing sake, which is Japanese rice wine. The ceremony is known as san-san-kudo and symbolizes forming a bond between the bride, the groom and their families. The couple takes sips from three cups of sake, and then their parents also take sips.

Sneaky Charges

If you are having a reception at a restaurant or catering hall, look very carefully at the extra charges that are included in your contract, and be prepared to question them. There is no need for a cake cutting charge. You will have waiters: they have nothing to do at that point in the evening but cut cake. Monster gratuities for maitre d´s fall into the same category. Actually, designated gratuities are totally out of line. The word gratuity represents a discretionary amount of money for good service: it should not be dictated to you. Tip cups on the bar are an absolute no-no. Bathroom attendents with tip baskets up are a no-no. A wedding is a hosted event, and should feel like one.

Handfasting

Handfasting is a marriage tradition in Scotland and other countries and cultures. The bride and groom are symbolically tied together with cords, and in some ceremonies small cuts are made on their wrists, which are bound together with a cloth. The vows go something like this:

Know now before you go further, that since your lives have crossed in this life you have formed ties between each other. As you seek to enter this state of matrimony you should strive to make real, the ideals which give meaning to both this ceremony and the institution of marriage.

With full awareness, know that within this circle you are not only declaring your intent to be handfasted before your friends and family, but you speak that intent also to your creative higher powers.

The promises made today and the ties that are bound here greatly strengthen your union; they will cross the years and lives of each soul´s growth.

Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?

Yes, we seek to enter.

In times past it was believed that the human soul shared characteristics with all things divine. It is this belief which assigned virtues to the cardinal directions; East, South, West and North. It is in this tradition that a blessing is offered in support of this ceremony.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the East. Communication of the heart, mind, and body Fresh beginnings with the rising of each Sun. The knowledge of the growth found in the sharing of silences.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the South. Warmth of hearth and home The heat of the heart´s passion The light created by both To lighten the darkest of times.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the West. The deep commitments of the lake The swift excitement of the river The refreshing cleansing of the rain The all encompassing passion of the sea.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the North Firm foundation on which to build Fertility of the fields to enrich your lives A stable home to which you may always return.

Each of these blessings from the four cardinal directions emphasizes those things which will help you build a happy and successful union. Yet they are only tools. Tools which you must use together in order to create what you seek in this union.

I bid you look into each others eyes.

[Groom´s Name], Will you cause her pain?
I May
Is that your intent?
No

[Bride´s Name], Will you cause him pain?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

*To Both*
Will you share each other´s pain and seek to ease it?
Yes


And so the binding is made. Join your hands
*First cord is draped across the bride and grooms hands*

[Bride´s Name], Will you share his laughter?
Yes


[Groom´s Name], Will you share her laughter?
Yes


*To Both*
Will both of you look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other?
Yes


And so the binding is made.
*Second cord is draped across the couples hands*

[Bride´s Name], Will you burden him?
I may
Is that your intent?
No

[Groom´s Name], Will you burden her?
I may
Is that your intent?
No


*To Both*
Will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union?
Yes


And so the binding is made.
*Drape third cord across the couples, hands*

[Bride´s Name], will you share his dreams?
Yes


[Groom´s Name], will you share her dreams?
Yes


*To Both*
Will you dream together to create new realities and hopes?
Yes

And so the binding is made.
*Drape fourth cord across the couples hands*

[Groom´s Name], will you cause her anger?
I may
Is that your intent?
No


[Bride´s Name], will you cause him anger?
I may
Is that your intent?
No


*To Both*
Will you take the heat of anger and use it to temper the strength of this union?
We will.


And so the binding is made.
*Drape fifth cord across the couples hands*

[Bride´s Name], Will you honor him?
I will


[Groom´s Name], Will you honor her?
I will


*To Both*
Will you seek to never give cause to break that honor?
We shall never do so.


And so the binding is made.
*Drape sixth cord across the couples hands*

*Tie cords together while saying:*
The knots of this binding are not formed by these cords but instead by your vows. Either of you may drop the cords, for as always, you hold in your own hands the making of breaking of this union.

*Once cords are tied together they are removed and placed on altar*

African Hand-Tying

In some African tribes, the bride and groom have their wrists tied together with cloth to symbolize their marriage.

Dressing for a Chinese Wedding

Never wear black to a Chinese wedding for you will be wishing the happy couple bad luck! Instead, wear celebratory colors such as red, pink or purple. Place a small evergreen branch in your hair to wish the couple “longevity.”